girl! he was asleep with his back to me.he farted and i actually felt the wind blow across my leg.nice
i seriously just saw a stripper from last weekend walk into the classroom next to me!!
I can't wait until weight watchers comes out with a beer
You leave a trail of fuck everywhere you go
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
It's like split custody, only he's not a kid and they have sex with him.
i still can't believe we survived that barcrawl. the third bar had bullet holes and we still went in.
All I've eaten today is cookie dough, pecan pie and three shots of jack. Finals week here I come.
My boobs love her too. She makes them feel important even though they're small
Yeah, you gave me a condom that I 100% coulda used, then an hour later you basically beat the shit out of me and physically took it from my pocket.
I'm going to fix your towel rack. I broke it while I was dancing on it.
A sexy devil squat down and peed in front of Tom Hanks from Castaway.
i need some magic done to my vagina
Coffee and girl scout cookies. Breakfast of champions.
Get fucked.
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