these two guys are about to go shot for shot with syrup
now he is talking to a potato
i can totally see doctors naming an STD after you
i can't, i'm blowing bubbles in class and getting credit for it
Just because he's a soilder doesn't mean his dick is a hero.
nothing like walking down the street with a garbage bag of puke trying to find a dumpster
Her gay brother kept hitting on me and cockblocking me. Don't even begin to tell me how bad your night was.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I haven't gone out since the baby was born. If I don't get arrested, in a fight, or both I'm going to be super pissed.
There was a slutty maid costume on the floor when I woke up, but the house was trashed. Either she's been fired or got promoted, I'm not sure which.
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
If I walk downstairs and Kelly is fucking in the laundry room again I'm gonna die
Ok fell asleep on a bus in south Carolina just woke up in Canada where the hell is the liquor store from here?!
i found a picture from last night of you sat on the floor naked, covered in butter and crying. care to explain?
I was hoping you could tell me..
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
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