I found the orange juice, it was hiding in the vodka...trickster.
I hope you shit your pants in a socially devastating situation.
Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
well you haven't lived until you've been 86'ed from a family restaraunt
Apparently you can talk a girl into leaving the bar and coming back to your tent, who knew?
I got woken up by a construction worker, turns out I was laying in a hallway, naked and wrapped in a matress pad. To answer your question no, I did not study for this test I got David Hasselhoff drunk
I swear to god he's making pineapple onions and cheese. He thinks he's making eggs onions and cheese
he just exposed your dildo usage to the table.
That moment when I wear the same thing I did to a motel nooner to my family's Christmas party... Ho Hoety Ho bitches
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
And you are going to be so turned on by my batman skills later
How do you explain to your kids that you met their mother well you were giving her a gynecological exam??
Today has been hell. Also I saw a dead man's penis. It's safe to say I will be getting very drunk tonight.
She's the other freshman on this drunken voyage
Randomize
