It's a Westpoint/Army thing, we talk about Miley Cyrus a lot
Why?
Because when is jailbait ever not funny? Answer: Never
he climbed up to our party on the 2nd floor balcony and then pulled a glass mug and a beer from his knapsack. these freshmen are intense
By the way, I got bored last night and just started putting my balls on every object in your room. One at a time.
he may be homeless but his dick however is not... anymore.
I'm sorry that I didn't get belligerently drunk and did not put my penis on your neck again
And you will no longer be getting a thank you note from my vagina
I'm basically flying you out for a long weekend of sex and going to the zoo
I'm cool with that
Had a dream I went to Disney to visit you and then I got really drunk and puked all over these little kids in line
how much boxed wine can one drink before work in a couple of hours?
You did things that should be illegal to a Twinkie and asked strangers to drive you home.
I mean seriously with your cock and my tits combined we could rule the world. Pinky and the brain style
Btw I definitely had pizza sauce on my face, a painful hickey on my neck, and I just remember screaming SISTER WIVES because of the girl's 1997 jean skirt! Wow.
he told me I was hypnotizing him with my mouth so I guess I do give good head
We're pretty sure we got naked at Pride, so running the two blocks to your place in my underwear is a step up the dignity ladder really.
This date is awful. He’s too boring to bang
Is porn accurate? Can I order a pizza and do the delivery boy?
Randomize
