Her dad smelled like someone lit a fart and burned their ass hairs.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
She laid down on my bed and played "I want you to want me" on my laptop. subtle.
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
when a girl feels in her heart, the way she feels in her vagina, anything is possible.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
There is a slip-n-slide in the hallway and a girl just did it topless cuz I told her it was my birthday. Where are you?
Weekday college schedule so far: get high as tits. Watch Family Guy marathons. Repeat.
My goal is to upperdeck the house I'm at, because it's some girl I don't know's birthday. Welcome to adulthood, bitch.
I would feel bad sleeping with her unless all of her personalities were on board with it.
I have cum and leaves all over me. Don't ask questions.
I just want to get drunk and wake up on Wednesday
I TOOK A FINGER IN THE BUTT YOU CAN OPEN THIS MESSAGE
how do you tell someone, in the most complimentary way possible, that they would make an excellent stripper?
yea i'll help you find a man. but, when I say jump, you say on who.
Randomize
