Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
he wrote Vegans should suck on cow dick on her wall with permanent marker. thats how he got the black eye
i was concerned for your health after you took your "last shot" four times...
She was really fucking loud. My neighbors definetly knew my name...
She did my hair, then ate me out. Switching teams was an awesome decision.
You were so calm and collected as you strolled out the door with 40 mcdonalds cups in your arms. It was legendary.
So the dog chewed my vibrator last night. It added a nice new texture actually.
Hooked up with a 20 year old. Only reason I did was cos I thought he was 18
I don't remember much, but I remember he called me the dick whisperer, so it must not have been all bad.
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Dude why can't I remember anything after walking in from my first beer bong?
It was immediately followed by your second, third, fourth and fifth
Did you know that chef boy-ar-dee was a real person? I watched a show about him. the history of the ravioli is more scandalous than you would think.
it's like he didn't even know what a vagina was
He’s over 6 feet has amazing posture and went to Harvard and has an awesome job and a great dick and loves Jesus and is an organ donor
Is this the guy you have listed as free food in your phone
Noooo he’s listed as free food #5
Honestly, you can’t tell the whole sorority he has a donkey dick and expect that no one would sleep with him after you broke up
Randomize
