There's this guy beside me dancing with this girl with no panties on. When I looked at him he said he's babysitting his bestfriend's girlfriend since he can't come out.
What a good friend
I told her we could go facebook official. If she ups the oral.
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
They went to the hospital to try backflips in the parking lot. Be ready for the call
oh yea it is. i was not expecting to look at a snowbank and just see flying mushrooms
one of them held the wheel while the other one changed her pants. while driving. on the thruway. what
I've thrown up twice at work. Just casually, in the mop sink. Then continued to make someone a milkshake. Want some ice cream?
I'm on the struggle bus
just ordered a number 1 at a fast food restaurant that doesn't have numbers
Just skate-of-shamed, shirtless, with a bucket or margaritas. Good luck beating that one.
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
Judging by the ckaw marks on my back i'm gonna go out on a limb and say that blonde chick was a werewolf. A sexy, kinky werewolf.
My manager just held my hair while I threw up in a dumpster. New low.
I've faked every orgasm I've ever had, I think I can fake being sick for 8 hours.
I came so hard my ears popped.
you asked me how to turn on the ladder
Randomize
