his penis looked like arnold from hey arnold. it was interesting.
you made me watch la bamba, and then you yelled at me for disrespecting your mexican heritage.
I am not a stalker...i just bring a whole new meaning to the word love
They're here. One showed up as a slutty Crayola, and I think the other came as The Fat Friend.
just had to sit in the middle of an aisle in stop and shop because we're too hungover and needed to take a break.
So awkward... The newspaper lady just caught me sitting stoned in my driveway at 5 am and asked if I was okay. I'm way better than ok right now
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
We're all just looking at each other quietly, hoping that no one brings up last nights shenanigans.
Holy crap, church bells in Cibolo just scared the hell out of me. I'm pretty sure they were yelling sinner at me.
She told me I should be proud of my dick pics, then told me she was in love with me, then I dropped her off at her boyfriend's. I was a new kind of failure tonight.
And in that, my finest lazy stoner moment, I used my cleavage to hold my bowl steady while I packed it laying down in bed.
I just got a lecture from your coked out sister about the monetary value of Dothraki hair braids. Take her home.
I know you're having some issues right now but can we focus on the gangbang?
All I’ve had today is sex and water. I think it’s time for tacos.
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