Rock
Scissors
Fuck
i hate having sex with him only a few drinks in. i like it better when i cant remember the gory details.
A girl limped into my class 15 minutes late wearing sunglasses, leggings, and a kiss me im irish shirt. She sat down and took her glasses off and im pretty sure she only had one eye's makeup still on. Someone had a great st pattys day.
there's a sign at taco bell and it says "bacon and ranch make everything better." it speaks to me.
The police scanner is talking about you again....
I hope this doesn't become one of those friendships where we dont have sex
the girl walking home behind me started yelling and pointing "i want an ass like hers!" i feel vaguely accomplished.
It's my first ever "i'm sorry for my excessive drug use" hand turkey. And I think it's pretty boss.
I JUST WANT TO HAVE MILDLY SOCIALLY ACCEPTABLE SEX WITH HIM AND CALL HIM CUPCAKE.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
Just made a memo in my blackberry that contains seth's funeral arrangements. I have a feeling he has big plans for the weekend.
I don't know if trying Molly for the first time before my flight was an awesome or aweful idea
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
So is the trick to long distance communication to be drunk during phone conversations?
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Randomize
