if hell is full of stilettos, fake tans, bleached hair, overused make-up, drawn out s's and blatent bitchiness, then i'm in hell right now.
Lol welcome to greek life
If I die tonight, I want you to know that your sister is awesome in bed
I don't make the first move. Ever. Unless were playing monopoly cause that's my shit
searching "dave" under the university of pittsburgh on facebook was not exactly how i hoped to find my baby daddy
She was surprised when she saw all our living room furniture was made from old kegs. It's like she's never met us before...
We're gonna go drive around campus and throw water balloons at all the drunk bitches wobbling around, wanna come?
Happiness is the polar opposite of catching your dad watching holiday themed porn
So was I the only one that was competing in the whale hunt?
this celing is unfamiliar to me... im just vaguely wondering where i am. but not quite concerned enough to do anything about it.
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I just overheard an "I'm going to get your dick so hard" conversation at Costco.
I found a video of us drunkenly yelling "we wanna be the Pope" as we passed around the blunt
It's going to be like a slumber party but with ketamine
idk what the male equivelent of vajazzling is but it better be worth the time
Oh god I found a set of car keys in my pocket, and I have no idea who's they are
Randomize
