There are 3 speedbumps now up. Think you can manage the urge to piss on them?
Aw shit! That's like putting me a in a room full of Captiain Crunch Donuts and Jasper Hale and not letting me put my mouth on either.
honestly if we didnt hate the same people we would have a friendship based on nothing
how did we ever eat at restaurants where they DIDNT squirt-gun tequila in our mouths?
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
i think i figured out where our problem might have started...when we poured more tequila on top of out margaritas to melt the ice bc they were too cold
hahaha or putting rum in the bbq sauce?
You refused to get in the cab so we rock paper scissored to decide who walked you home and the fat guy was it. So don't blame your poor hook-up choice on me; it was all you.
I just sprawled out on my bedroom floor and cried while shoveling chocolate into my mouth.. I should not have Bacardi at home
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
I've actually, minus lsat night have actually changed my drinking habits
Her boobs take up a lot of room so God had to skimp on the brains
let me drop the bass on your empty vagina syndrome
Well it's official, last night I hooked up with the third girl from the apartment downstairs.
Dude that's a hat trick!
I know, I tossed my hat on the floor as I was walking out.
had a nice chat with the older gay fellow who works in the bakery at the new vons about vday...we both feel that it's a day of dashed expectations & concerns that we'll have to be cut out of our spanx
It was 16 hours of liver killing mistake making goodness
He ate me out while I finished season 1 of Stranger Things. If that's not a modern day relationship goal, then I don't know what is.
Randomize
