When the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie, you're a dumbass
I'm youtube-ing children's choirs. Am I adorable? Or am I a child predator?
Predator. Straight up.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Who would have thought google would have HELPED me fail a test...not pass...thank you pacman, thank you google....
Oh btw, my mom called... you made the police blotter in the newspaper. Don't worry, she's mailng me a copy so I can put in on the fridge.
Dude Eric's high and buying everyone taquitos. How much room do we have in the freezer?
I picked the lock on the bathroom door and sang him a song while he pooped. Why is he mad?
You ass. You're not the one who bought me flowers, so obviously you will not be the recipient of the blow job of gratitude.
cocks speak louder than words, as they say
Nobody says that.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
i need some food
Holy shit I forgot about you stabbing him.
idk man, I was fucked up and eating fried rice at the grocery store, tried to wave at her but she just looked concerned at me.
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
I plan to try out my new vibrator and watch Star Trek: The Next Generation. It's a busy night.
AMAZON SELLS SEX SWINGS!
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