they thought it would be fun to get out their yearbook and see who hooked up with the most guys..I won...I don't even go to the same school
The pickup line "You look exactly like my sister" would only work in Arkansas...SCORE!!
you kept calling numbers in ur phone book and saying, "I love your show, I'm a long time listener, first time caller."
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
As a side note, my abs are sore. Most likely cause? Orgasms. Thank you.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
he made a bald eagle out of coke lines
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
oh wow I have been there. Hell one time Matt and I woke up naked with pizza rolls in the bed.
Im rolling face in a pizzeria. I want to be with people who love me.
just shotgunning some tallboys in the cooler, you?
HOW DO YOU GET RAISES EVERY TWO WEEKS?!
His dick's name has evolved from Sebastian to Big Daddy to Barbara Streisand to Barbara Walters. I think the transformation is finally complete.
He went down on me while i ate a whole 7/11 pizza. New level unlocked
I was cock-blocked by a swat team last night.
Do you know anything about how the saran wrap ended up on my toilet seat?
Randomize