happy early fathers day!!!
im not a father
about that...
So there is this guy preaching the word of God outside our club. I went up to him and said, "God made this body, and he made it for premarital sex." Sup, Hell?
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Don't make me choose between a good grade and anal
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
just had wine and brownie batter for dinner. Single life is good
On an unrelated side note: I shall now attempt to crawl to the bathroom. Where I will lay motionless on the cold ceramic bathtub with hot water pouring over my shivering body as I desperately try not to vomit. Good day.
Hey, the point is, I have 3 guys to fuck to get over the last one. It's my golden rule. You told me to find a hobby! It translated as "find another guy".
That is the opposite way I told you to find a hobby.
I have got to stop letting people hang ornaments from my nipple ring.
Tis the season.
I enjoy the level of friendship we have achieved until you ask me to determine what may or may not be gentile warts via iphone pic
DONT TELL ME I CANT HAVE AN ENTIRE BOTTLE OF VODKA AT DINNER. IM AN ADULT. I PAY BILLS.
She was giving me head, and a cop pulled up next to us. I freaked when he looked over at me, but so did he and rear ended the car in front of him.
Your the only girl I know that carries a $1100 purse with tater tots inside
I can't get past the whole vibrator up the ass stunt.. Can we have a ceremonial burning for his dignity because I will not ever touch that again..
I got home and found him passed out in my tank top so i think i'll put lipstick on him and mass text a picture to everyone in his phone. that's what he gets for eating all my wheat thins
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