i learned of a new sex move called the pterodactyl. 3 guys stand in a row. 1 girl blows the one in the middle while jerking off the other two. kids these days!
Yaeh! Back in our day we had to wait our turn for some party whore to blow us!
well there you go. the average partycunt evolved into megapartycunt just like scientists predicted.
opening your purse in class to grab a pen only to find dollar bills and pink fuzzy handcuffs instead...that's a cool feeling
I asked her if she was the outdoorsy type, she replied "I had sex on a fourwheeler once, does that count?"
I can see why you broke up with her now... it was like having sex with a corpse.
They're doing a Bong-A-Thon for 4/20. I don't care if you quit. You are coming out of your weed retirement for this.
I didn't scare your mother by showing up on the roof, did I?
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WRONG DAY TO COME TO CLASS STONED!! WE'RE WATCHING BIRTHING VIDEOS!!!!
Oh yes. Made out with a grandmother..... she had fake boobs and it was 330am. That makes it okay.
Mardi gras at its finest.
You did that scary laugh you always do when you're blacking out except she's never heard it before and though you were choking and screamed at all of us when we didn't call an ambulance
Just successfully made home fries from potatoes we used as bowls while stoned as shit. I deserve a trophy.
I just wrote my resume on the same park bench I got felt up at in freshman year of highschool... I've truly come full circle
I would have rather been getting my vagina slowly waxed all day then be here.
She's one of those people who could be either 16 or 23. In which case she's too old for me or in dangerously jailbait territory for you, bro.
Last night I ate a candle out of a strippers ass.... I guess it was an okay night.
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