i just realized Britney Spears and I are more alike than I thought. Both of us have our parents in complete control of our lives, we both have restraining orders on previous boyfriends, and we all know both of us can put on a hell of a show
If it was for sex do you really think i would asking for a mass vote? I'm like fidel castro when it comes to sex. No public approval needed.
Just saw two girls doing a walk of shame together. Slut bonding at it's best.
I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Somebody was walking their dog with their car. seriously
Hahaha I asked him about her bjs and he said "I would not wish that on anyone"
Ps. I feel like I may pee myself this weekend. Either drunkenly or out of excitement. Toss up
IF HE CAN'T EVEN MAKE EYE CONTACT IN CLASS, I DOUBT THERE WILL BE OTHER FORMS OF CONTACT ON OUR FIRST NOT-A-DATE DATE
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
I'm gonna play this game called Conquer the Dicks. I think it is self explanatory.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
Well, I'll handle this like I always do. Black the fuck out, make out with randoms, give out my number like candy. You know. Standard operating procedure
I was watchin a porno and I sware I saw that dude at the bar at applebees the other night
Bro, I was just laying in bed with this girl and her boyfriend came an woke me up
Randomize
