She's JV to your varsity
oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
You can't have hate sex in a hallway!!
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
Last night at the bar my fuck buddies found out about each other.
Wtf? What happened?
Not quite sure but they rock, paper, scissored to see who was taking me home.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
thanks for being my moral compass. and thanks for not always pointing north so i can be slutty and not feel bad about it.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
My boyfriend just asked what time I was coming over. As soon as my old BF unchains me. I think he ran away.
The water at the venue tasted HORRIBLE so I just kept drinking booze. It was like the medievals.
it's ok my mom asked me why i had a guys shirt on and also why there was chocolate all over my bra
He was pretty handsy. Told me I tasted like smoke. Good think he tasted that and not the stomach acid I just puked not ten minutes before.
Our nipples touched last night. It was tender.
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
Excuse me I just made a hot pocket without burning down the house, I think i can do anything.
Randomize
