my soul wont recognize me after tonight
Now that I've come to graduate college. I realized the only discernible skill I learned was how to roll a joint properly. go me.
Well thats $24,000 well spent.
i think ur clone was at the club last week. she slapped some tall girl in the face who tried to steal her spot on the podium. i dont know if ur like her, but she seemd like a ninja badass with superpowers
I love my grandma, but if I have to sit and watch one more show on Bravo, I'm gonna burn her fuckin house to the ground
PS: the photo I uploaded for this internship site is the same one i used for my fake ID. I like to keep it classy.
I just realized that I'm gonna have to lower my standards if I want random head.
You were offering to spell people's name for a dollar.
I WALKED myself out of breath. And I'm lost I'm a Tim Hortons parking lot. That's how hungover I am.
Imagine Captain Hook, but in penis form and sometimes shy.
It's that moment where you find out the girl you've been dating for 6 months is a mob daughter. Post breakup.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
It's amazing
I want to run hundreds of miles and do a whole semesters worth of homework while flying on a unicorn and throwing endless glitter bombs
I swear, the cow we tried to tip tried to eat me. and all I could think was, oh how the tables have turned. worst trip ever
SINCE WHEN WAS USING A FROZEN WATER BOTTLE ATTACHED TO A ROPE AS A THROWING WEAPON A GOOD IDEA??
Don't worry, I'm sure your thrusting skills are on point.
Randomize