i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
i just made a list of the people i have slept with. is it bad that some of them are just either names of the places i met them or the color of the shirts?
i also rounded the number up for good measure. i am sure there are a few i have forgotten about.
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
Getting business cards printed for tonight. Would you rather be: 1. Vice President of Argentina 2. Celebrity Dental Assistant or 3. Dial-Up Internet Technician
3. Dial-Up Internet Technician.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
He said to use 30 racks as chairs and then drink til we fall thru the box
Will you judge me if i do shots in my basement closet first? No? Okay good
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
I just walked out topless, stared his brother straight in the eye, and ate all the rest of their cookie dough.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I'm not finished with being a sloppy white girl alcoholic. I didn't postpone having a husband and kids for sober weekends.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
I used an emoji to tell him I was pregnant. I should feel bad about that, right?
I've come to the conclusion that my issue is I'm not fucking a guy with a headboard
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