normally I beat off every night before I go to bed even though my little brother sleeps in the same room. So I was starting to last night, and he jumped out of bed and said "Fuck, Im not listening to this shit again" We havent talked since. fuck me
if it walks like a guido and talks like a guido, i'm gonna fuck it.
They found an open window, climbed through and proceeded to arrest half the party. These campus cops are like fucking ninjas.
I am at 2.05 miles in under 11 minutes. So either this thing is broke or I should always work out wasted.
She literally just cut half her hair off because she's tired of asking someone to hold it back when shes drunk and puking.
I don't know what to be prouder of: the fact that last night i was able to successfully find my way home from evanston with 3-d glasses on, or that i was able to make my way around my house in the dark with my pants around my ankles
well we called the liquor store to tell them to stay open five more minutes so we could make it and they recognized our voices. I've never been more proud.
you were telling us about the time you had sex in an alley and he stopped, looked up and said 'it was a cul-de-sac' and went right back to what he was doing.
I can't help that I bring out the sex in people
anyone can pick a bar fight and pick up a waitress at a bar, not everyone hangout with two wolves. TWO WOLVES.
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
He texted me "sup", so I sent him that gif of the surprised guy and apparently it offended him
Dude like i feel like i did ALL OF THE DRUGS yesterday
I don't want to inconvenience you with my dick\n\n
I just watched your fat stupid son get hit by a Prius. Ran right in front of it. He's all right . But... Maybe you should have taught him to look both ways like a responsible parent does.
Randomize
