Contrary to popular belief, while 19 is an attractive age, it does not equate to sexual prowess.
Does my status still say I suck cocks? I don't know how to change it
No.. It's totally over.. He deleted the poke I sent him.. That makes it official.
the bathroom floor of the diner looks a lot different when you're not rolling around and puking on it.
Just ordered an appetizer sampler to distract the fat chicks so we can escape
Nahh. Maybe not even a handful. It's more like a heaping teaspoon worth of dick.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
Mehhh. I just tried to type 'extremely', and it auto corrected to 'creek rot'. IT KNOWS WHAT I LOOK LIKE
"You can go raw dog up in me". Exact words. I can't decide whether to run, or fuck. Help.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
In two separate occurrences, I could have avoided getting my heart broken, and chlamydia, all with a left swipe.
You cant use biscuit as a chaser
I wonder if my sister will drive me around while I do bong hits in the back seat..
yeah but really his dick tasted like soap. like i was blowing a bar of soap
We really gotta wear capes to the bar more often...
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