You're mentally unstable and I would hate to be you
We should takd a huggy cab to snuggle bunnyville
i do not condone bathtub ky wrestling
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
I just used a coupon while buying plan B. The pregnant sales clerk nodded in approval.
She called herself a train and then took off all her clothing. I forget everything after that.
I saw you two flinging Jello at the sidewalk if that helps jog your memory.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
Do you remember calling me and dedicating a shot to me?
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
I was late because I helped this old romanian lady mow her lawn at 2AM.
The one with glasses said he was keeping my bra. He had me sign it before he left and he said he would be hanging it up in his bunker. I support our troops.
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Why is my vagina being sacrificed for yours? I'm sure he would take a piece of you too. Your turn.
I just had to go dumpster diving, at 3am, in the rain, because I realized that I somehow threw away the brand new package of birth control pills I picked up from the pharmacy this afternoon. So I'm sort of a responsible adult.
Literally just stood behind a guy in line at Walmart get his card declined when he attempted to purchase condoms. That's rock bottom.
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