i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
babies were throwing up all over the place
He said they were doing a skit in class apparently someone else is dressed like a horse. Ive never felt more proned to skipping class than now
i just used my scantron for my final to make paper shotglasses. i'd say i passed in flying colors.
Just woke to a Christmas wrapped pack of hotdogs in my bathtub. How high did we get?
So I went outside my house this morning and basically my entire front lawn is covered in gummi bears... I think that involves you guys.
You are softly singing to the wall while slow dancing with it. I feel as though you should discontinue this behavior.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
I'm drawing the line at your vagina. I will not accompany you to get that pierced and/or tattooed. There's got to be some mystery to our relationship.
You turn 21 at midnight!
This is better than being born!!
His premature ejaculation problem is getting old.
I will be the DD but everyone has to call me Mistress
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
this old people party is bangin. they have apple cider with everclear in it
You'll probably laugh but I am currently in bed in the fetal position wrapped in only my ninja turtles towel. Save me.
Randomize