I am going to be in the room whjen you have your first child and spit on its face before its even all the way out of you.
best part, i was ridiculous and none of them were judging me bc they didn't want my vagina. it was like i was a pretty painting
It was like if Side-show Bob had a vagina for a mouth
Does getting a boner while watching the celtic women sing opera on ETV make me cultured?
what date should I let him know how fucked up I am?
u kept pointing at random guys and making quacking or mooing sounds.
Two girls just making out in the elevator. Didn't stop when the doors opened. Part of me didnt mind, but part did. Bc I wanted to get on the elevator without it getting awkward. Am I gay?
If you value my life, if you value your own, please look for that godforsaken cookie. Please.
I stuck a note to his door with my gum explaining why i couldn't spend the night. as i was walking away, he opened the door...i fell down and played dead. deffinitly didn't see me.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
The bed I'm sleeping in has a headboard only handcuffs could love. I'm gonna pick up a local dude and wreck that.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
Let's play "Guess What I Just Found In My Vagina?"
She couldn't find her toothbrush so I had to wait while she sucked on the 12 peppermints she found under the couch. Pretty resourceful for her level of intoxication.
I swear to god, no guy has been as interested in sticking stuff up my butt as this girl
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