Man THE POSTAL SERVICE is awesome when I'm high..... But they suck when I'm sober.
Just watched Hilary Duff have a three-some on Gossip Girl...all I could imagine was that LIzzie Maguire cartoon girl freaking out above their heads
oh my god. i just found my camera... on top of the bush outside of my house. never let me drink everclear again
Just made out with the bride... She was still in her dress & I was still in my bridesmaid dress, how's that for an album picture?!?
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
I'm in class. I'm not opening a page with the words "death erection" in the link. There's people behind me lol.
Is it ironic that the girl with the horse face is also on the equestrian team?
I just contemplated drinking cheese dip. And by "contemplated," I mean "attempted and was forcibly stopped from."
THAT FUCKER WASTED TWO OF MY COLORED CONDOMS! HE DIDN'T EVEN FUCKING FINISH IN IT HE JUST SLAPPED IT ON AND WASTED IT!
I was trying to get everyone to go to the bar but I puked on my hands, so nobody took me seriously.
I woke up wearing a lax pinnie under my shirt, a triathlon medal, and a dora backpack... I think I had fun
Do you know how hard it is to was the scent of sex from your hair in a gas station bathroom?!
I have 35 pounds of pennies. Need any?
What can i say, my face is nice and my body is just unreal. And my beer pouring/stealing is incredible \n
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