I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
now there's a facebook group for all the people whose lives i've ruined
the room spins SO much faster in panama
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
best. trip. ever. this is going to be too much fun. petland isnt going to know what hit them.
Only once have I found myself in the condom aisle holding a bundt cake...
Only I could get hit on by homophobic straight guys in a drag bar.
my suitemate came in my room last night and flashed me. and then she just walked away. deff transferred to the right school
I had sex in a panda mask the other night.
How high were you when you left that message, cause you made honest-to-God, credible seal noises.
I'm jealous, curious, and aroused. All at the same time.
My job here is done.
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
How do I stop your cat from bathing me? I'm afraid she'll get drunk off my sweat
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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