Bad idea. College students cannot afford both alcohol and a cat. Unless said cat is irish, and can feed itself with fifths of whisky.
Yeah that's one way to look at it on the other hand MY FUCKING BED CAUGHT ON FUCKING FIRE
A kid in my class brought a George Foreman and cooked food mid lecture. When the prof found out, all the kid did was ask if he wanted some.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
I heard you were walking home with taylor with your dress completely up and your ass exposed
Yeah, that sounds like my life.
I knew it was a good Wednesday night when I woke up tucked in to NOT my own bed with my beer helmet, an empty bottle of Jose, and a trash can placed in front of my face.. Happy 20th!
Shits getting dirty between us in her dad's bedroom. I'm talking early millennium rap and r&b
It's the building I live in, they were lucky I was wearing clothes at all
I GOOGLED IT. BEES CAN MASTURBATE. WHAT.
you'll probably come home to me baked as fuck and shirtless
I just pulled a seven inch black hair out of my ass. Pretty sure that means we're dating now
Stay positive! You think people like sad vaginas? NO! You'll get some!
That awkward moment when you realize you've been secretly blackout dating someone for three months. Drunk me is in a committed relationship.
"Here let me wipe my uterus off your dick" was probably the most unsexy thing said after period sex. I should get an award
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