no, he's only a walking dick if he mans up. right about now he's just a walking transgender.
The worst mistakes make the best memories. Write that down.
In the middle of blowin me she stoppped and told me how easy it would be to insert a catheter ..... Apparently she was a nursing major
weed brownie and a latte, breakfast of champions
I have a ginormous moral hangover. Strip club blues.
This guy kept running around with a blender giving people shots of everclear and vodka. Best. Toga. Party. Ever.
This lumberjack with a huge beard is doing his group presentation in a dirty t shirt that says "I'm only 2 girls short of a threesome"
My hope for you over spring break is that you can be some disease free girl's random spring break mistake.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
She showed me her tits and my first thought was "I want these to feed my future children." I'm scared.
He wouldn't let me leave his house until he made me orgasm once for every year I've been alive. The birthday sex song did not prepare me for this.
I am going to MURDER whoever gave him my phone number but it was probably drunk me so I'm conflicted.
A 3am FaceTime to go to IHOP is the closest thing to a bootycall that I'm getting
When he breaks your heart after he reveals he's gay, I'll be there for you. -Love, Dad
CUM CAME OUT OF MY NOSE. MY SINUSES ARE ENTIRELY FUCKED UP NOW BC OF THE CUM TRAVELING IN PLACES IT SHOULD NOT HAVE.
Randomize
