so how does one go about finding a summer fling?
take advantage of an intern
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
i can't believe he got me to come over to him by waving a natty light at me.
Remind them to make the "above the influence" commercial about us fallin off a ferris wheel
I gave up sex for lent.
I guess that means I'm postponing our date until after Easter.
i told the doctor i drank a college amount of alcohol. judgemental prick
She had a boyfriend but was all over this drunk guy that she just met..she said she loved him and then puked all over him.
we just saw you getting yelled at by the cops for trying to 'hijack' a street sweeper...how have you not been arrested yet?
we've got reservations. ask for the eat a bag of dicks table
She just asked if I wanted to eat nachos off of her boobs... I'm going to marry this girl.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
Whatcha doing tonight? Reply TURNUP if you are drinking, or STOP to cancel messages
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
I gave in, made out with her, and long story short, I'm giving hetero another try.
Randomize
