ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
i think i gave myself a perma-hangover. or god just hates me.
Taking a shot for every status related to the patriots losing. Hello hospital.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
I bruise way too easily for the kind of rough sex I want...
You are colorful like whore, yet adorable, like sad puppy. You need more drink.
that bitch in the red sedan is still teasing me with the ice cream cone. i'm going to show her my dick
Highlight of the night was you walking into the men's room yelling "My husband is diabetic" and crawling under the stall to yell at me.
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
Lost feeling in my face, my shoe and had a nose bleed. That's not wings. Fuck red bull.
I needed tweezers to get my thong out of my ass this morning.
I gave him a handjob in the uber car. Life is really spiraling downwards.
I'm floating on a 30mph cloud right now not giving a fuck
Yep that's the face of someone whose dick I would put in my mouth without hesitation
If he has a beard, chances are, that’s an open invitation to sit on his face
Randomize
