I just googled dawgpound, shoulda seen that pornsite coming
ofcourse shes the first one pregnant. wasnt she the one who asked the middle school health teacher how many calories are in sperm?
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
Should you consider yourself out of control when everyone at the party is cheering you on while you're puking, and on the last heave you act like you're rolling dice right before the finale???
I came home ate all of my roomates poptarts and then vommited on her duvet cover. I don't think today is the day to suggest the whole "sex instead of rent money" idea
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
Clearly my hormones are sending beaming lights to every penis in the area
The best of us have puked in our office garbage cans. I just hope yours wasn't the metal mesh kind...and bagless like mine. Rock n roll office manager.
Good. Need a drinking partner later. FOR AMERICA!!!
So glad the long weekend is over so I can bring this bender to a merciful end.
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
Would you still love me if my nipple fell off?
I was in the bathroom and I heard a phone ding inside one of the stalls. I really wanted to say, nature is calling, but I was still in my work uniform
I feel like I should be having more sex dreams of my boyfriend than his sister..
She’s fine. Found her in the bathtub eating Cheerios and watching Rugrats on an iPad.
Randomize
