Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
he had a sign stolen from the tennis court hanging above his bed that said, "please limit play to one hour while others are waiting"
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
oh yeah I know that guy. he's legit. slept in my closet a few times
Heads up. We filled your kiddie pool with kool-aid and vodka. Things are about to get Out. Of. Hand. Quickly.
i had to pay fifty dollars for throwing up in the limo, 60 fucking dollars to throw up all over myself
We call it lazy sex. We just lay next to each other and help each other masturbate. that way we can both be on bottom.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
His legs actually look hot in that dress. He might even make a better girl than Josh
YOU BETTER NOT BE SHAVING YOUR LEGS RIGHT NOW IM TRYING TO HELP YOU
Fuckin' raining men in my bedroom while I'm trying to drunk eat a rather large portion of pasta. Like shoo I already picked who I'm sleeping with. Pasta wins.
I swear I get as excited about the sound of a condom wrapper as my cat gets when she's getting a can of food.
The air tonight was full of shame when we saw each other.
Well if u wouldn't have had sex on the front porch last night I think that could have been avoided.
Ok so I need a recap of last night...
YOU SPENT SIX DOLLARS AT NICKEL BEER NIGHT!!! How's that
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