..well, okay, so long as I don't have to wear an apron or vaccum in high heels.
nope just do me i'm drunk and easy to plz
Last night I broke through a door, was hospitialized, arrested, and threw my shoe at a bouncer. This summer is gonna be fuckin sick.
So I have to ask... did I meet your lumberjack expectations? I mean, minus the red flannel and all.
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
she gave me a handjob while we were watching elf.... it's that time of year again!!
Life is so much better after having sex.
margarita wednesday is really going to dip into new year's eve thursday
she's like bobby knight all she does is scream and point
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
You were directing traffic around her for 30min after she passed out in the middle of the road.
You really are best friends.
I need to puke. I need a shower. I need rehab. I need to detox and puke. I feel like demons are inside of me.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
She asked what a chaser is. I died a little inside, please come back..
Randomize
