Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
she claims you yelled BOMBS AWAY when you came. tell me she's lying
but she didn't tell you i squeezed, built up pressure, and napalmed her face as i yelled it, did she
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Correct me if I'm wrong here... but did we serenade each others breasts to "winds of change" last night?
Thank you for holding my bra last night while i did a topless lap around the house
Does peppermint hummus sound good or am I just high?
Remind me tomorrow that I was taking shots of burnetts in the subway line while placing my order
Dude it's sisterhood of the traveling wine glasses here
Hun, it's always cinco de Drinko in our family. It's like Groundhog Day. Only with more booze.
I think he's like 40 and maybe a little sociopathetic and i have never been so turned on
Another text to add to the intervention pile, i see
That song just makes me wanna take off my top and shake my titties all around the club.
Well, let me first tell you that jack and cokes were ONE FUCKING DOLLAR.. It's like the club wanted me to make poor choices.
That man makes my giblets tingle
Congrats? I think?
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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