her vagine was all disorganized.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
Whoa, Gary Coleman died
Whatchu talkin bout?!?!
Too soon.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
I mean, we do coke and have sex occasionally...I wouldn't call that a relationship.
I'm gonna tie him up and fart in that pathetic excuse for a mustache
I offered to lick your vagina while wearing a suit... Pretty sure chivalry is well alive.
Just came so hard my back cracked. Other women are totally missing out if they don't masturbate.
You're an idiot. I have LIVED as a cautionary tale of what happens when you drink too much and stick your dick in crazy, HAVE YOU LEARNED NOTHING?
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
I'm shaking a cocktail while in bed. Is that bad?
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
Do you think it would be okay if i cleaned my cartilage piercing with the leftover vodka?
I should not have moved in with him. He's got porn stashed everywhere like a homosexual squirrel.
You love porn!
Not in the sugar bowl when I'm making my Mom coffee I don't.
You know you're getting old when you pick up hot sorority girls at the bar, and they write down their phone number, and under it 'we're great babysitters!'
Randomize
