yeah well you didnt even puke from the alcohol. we cut you off and went to huck finn's and told you that the "irish cream" coffee creamers had baileys in it, so you shot down like eight of them and puked all over the floor. it was great. we cheered you on and everything
As a pleasant surprise..I woke to find a Burrito and Bottle of Gatorade .....Merry XMAS to ME
Today was my first day of hebrew and I learned how to say give me sex... I think I can quit now
Just think, if your stepsister would've gotten knocked up 2 years earlier, she could've had a TV show. What a bitch.
I think she's a little more wasted than usual. She just crawled on the floor to tell mom it was time to take a shot.
It was almost awkward to look at you naked while listening to Circle of Life. Just saying.
Yeah but I get laid and I know. He drank toilet water last night and he doesn't know about that either. Still makes me happy though.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Less adorably, the dog stared me down, yelping, while I gave him a morning blowie.
I woke up with a captain's hat on my desk.
Is there a reason drunk me put drunk you's phone in the freezer?
If you can endure a laser on the butthole, you can endure a wax on the butthole. Those are words to live by.
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
I ate at the cafeteria for the first time yesterday and today I think I had an hour long fart.
Randomize
