I was thinking about texting her and telling her I had syphilis when I was with her and that she should get tested. just for shits and giggles. skank dahaha
nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
Great, now justin bieber is gonna sing a song about chile
did i walk over a car last night?
My "Week Of Not Checking Into OK Cupid So I Don't Hook Up With Another Fat Chick" lasted four hours. On the plus side, she was the smallest one yet.
We're already drunk. 4 hours to go still. And there's a bear advisory. TOP WEEKEND.
He brought me breakfast in bed after our one night stand. Beer and Cheerios I may come back to this place
New low. Just realized I hooked up with a guy from Grindr in the hallway of a building my great grandfather used to own..
So I'm hiding in my bathroom smoking bowls because my landlords kids came over to visit my dog... My life has reached a new low
Grrr. Fine. You get oral for being unwrong.
Hey mike is locked out, sleeping on the common room couch, no idea where his pants are nor does he know where he is. When you get this let him in? And let me know ur alive too!
We could have fun in a cardboard box. Think of the damage we could do at an amusement park!
Saddle up bitches, we're going to an orgy.
Okay I’ll say it... THIS MOVIE FUCKS
That’s probably the first time I've heard Little Women described that way and I love it
Randomize