I'm at a bar that has girls so awful looking even you would not have sex with them.
Well... I doubt that.
I only kidnapped one of them. chill
It's a sad day when you have to slightly move your fupa to shave.
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
Don't feel too badly. Until twenty minutes ago my paper was a heading and a pizza order.
Just used the salt in the bottom of my mcdonalds bag from last night on the eggs i made this morning. Way too hungover for this
The fool I made of myself at the Ugly Christmas Sweater party last night was surpassed this morning when I walk of shamed 6 miles at 7am with one mysterious wet leg and no pants on. I think my mom saw me and waved.
Instead of sending me a picture of his dick, he sent me a drawing of it on drawsomething. This game is getting out of control.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
At least I will not still be rolling when I pick up this animal. Thats a good development in five years
can I share that I'd like to fuck him in my new car as a sort of car warming present to myself?
Nothing like waking up naked and alone on your floor to remind you that you make life mistakes often.
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
Just so you know, if I get bored tomorrow I WILL pretend to get drunk in the bathroom and crash the whole thing
I accused him of not drinking enough alcohol and eating tacos after midnight. I was sober and he's not a gremlin. I would say bad.
Randomize
