My professor just used "labia" and "numchucks" in the same sentence. I am dying.
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
the last time i saw him was an hour he was floating face down in a pool... but i'm sure he's fine.
i had to take off my light up shamrock necklaces, my professor was getting suspicious.
i'm already feeling the tequila hangover i'm going to have on friday
Imagine if you could have something so delicious, like your taste buds went on LSD while eating a chocolate tiramisu. That's the opposite of what cum tastes like.
Btw: some husbands are not impressed by me trying to snap photos of their wives camel toe.
Remember the couple Steve and I heard and rated their sex based on the bed squeaks cuz we couldn't sleep through the noise? We got them back. They turned up the radio to drown us out.
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
Safe to say I'm terrified but totally AMPED
Start warming up your vocal cords, because Fucking With The Windows Open season has arrived.
Bro you fell face first into the sand and then balled up into the fetal position and yelled help untill I picked you up, no more whiskey for you...
you're now officially the 3000 mile booty call. congrats.
My neck feel like I've been sucking Goliath's dick.
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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