i spent my evening searching "the sims having sex" on youtube
we're no longer friends
I'm pretty sure I'm almost gay. Like, I'd do it if I had no choice. Like, if i were in prison I'd try it.
I feel like our bond is deeper now that we're both sleeping with married men. now we're really bffls
we ended up doing shots out of those medicine cups..swine flu finally did something good for me
I wish guys would just cum water 'cause you don't have to worry about being pregnant and it'd be like a squirt gun fight
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Oh if I trust ANYTHING about you it's your ability to lead a douchebag around by the dick
you were afraid hed set himself on fire so you dumped a box of baking soda on him
I just pulled the nickels from earlier out of my bra in class. The guy next to me is either terrified or intrigued.
You know you're hung over when the glare from the cream cheese on your bagel is just too bright...
I've finally done it, I've downloaded some messenger lesbians like to use because some girl wanted to flirt.
Congrats, you're all grown up now.
I FEEL LIKE A GAY BUTTERFLY
Why am I sleeping on top of the fridge?
You were playing hide and seek with the dog. she couldn't find you and you passed out.
If I could eat my chicken parm naked, it would be the closest I could ever be to God.
I ripped ass in on and around her face during a hard 69. I don't think she'll ever call me again.
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