I woke up this morning wearing my tux shirt and jacket, but no pants.
______ was pissed. My breath tastes like tequila and doritos, and I couldn't get it up.
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Just got booed while taking a piss and asked if I 'call that a penis.' Get me the fuck out nf yankee stadium.
I mean I had a leg brace. It would have been irresponsible for me to be on top.
just saw someone whip out a flask during lecture... I think I found a study partner
i convinced her i need a blow job every morning to wake up because i have a medical condition.
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
I HAVE A PIGEON IN MY JACKET.
I drove two hours just to throw up on myself today at the beach. My family saw the whole thing and my younger cousin cried
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
I know it's anime porn but I promise you the guy looks like Fred Durst
She is still out of it but keeps saying ur name she said to tell u dinosaurs aren't real but biscuit with a z made bad choices
That time of your life is like a blur to me. There was churches, car fucking, and conservatives
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
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