forget your mom, you can see her anytime. A one night stand only happens ONE night.
I wish facebook had a fuck off button.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
Umm you don't wanna know how many "I'm sorry for calling you last night" fb wallposts I just had to write...
just wondering who decided to put a cup of throw up in my fridge
I'm about to tackle a 10 year old off a sea doo
She's gone now. Left with the wind like a majestic leaf that just rides the invisible current to locations unknown. And dude, her friends were really hot.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
When I told him he could take naked pics of me, did I really need to specify that he could not email them to my brother's friends for bragging rights?
I was ok with it until you started yelling " just the tip!" I know she's you gf but don't backseat drive the three-way.
No we don't really celebrate valentines day, we just use it as an excuse to drink 3 bottles of red wine and fuck for a few hours.
Well statistically J has a 1 in 3 chance of hospitalization when downtown
And a 3 for 3 for disapeearing
And I woke up by myself with peanut butter.. Cool
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
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