sooooo how many boyfriends is too many?
Just invented new drinking game watching Hocus Pocus... everytime they say "virgin" wetake a shot and yell out "to j****"
i woke facing the corner with my computer and i had googled "how to put out a fire" i am so scared to turn around
do you ever get flashbacks of ppl you had sex with and just shudder at how gross they were/how drunk you were?
story of my life.
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
She bit me. She gave me a brief pity cuddle. I gave her an awkward backrub, somehow I thought it would be a good idea to include the vagina in that. It wasn't.
He said in a slur "I go so hard, even when I..." and cut himself off by projectile vomiting all over the ice luge.
There are very few times i will succumb to laying naked on my bathroom floor. But lastnight is a resonable enough cause.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
If you go to Tinseltown tonight. First bathroom on the left, second stall. Avoid. It's still coming to terms with what I did to it.
I'm alittle affraid you might be dead, seeing how your work party is in an hour and you haven't answered me? I mean I'm picturing you 1. Passed out in your car covered in fries or 2. On a boat in a box to Mexico covered in coke. Please let it be number 1. And aren't we going to your work party?
If only I could bank my drunk hookups for a sober IOU.
I don't know how to say "Sorry I was banging your boyfriend before I knew about you but you're awesome and we should hang out." without just saying it.
Homeboy just asked me to strip for him. He should not be this horny and allowed to be in Vegas with his kid.
Randomize
