now i know why they say having sex with her is the equivalent to licking a pay phone
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
took out my tampon, fucked him, and put a new one back in all before he realized I was on my period. beat that one bitch.
So I missed her say 'don't' before 'come in me'. She felt what was happening and freaked - which actually made the moment 100x better.
So, I picked up my 7 ft tall lamp post and used it to close my door. I feel quite accomplished.
who do i root for if I want Christiano Ronaldo to win the world cup on a team by himself and then bang chicks on the pitch?
We asked "Is that Andy puking in the bushes, its 7 AM" he looks up and goes "It's okay guys, its 7:30"
No one knows who he is but he hasn't missed a shot in beer pong yet. He's dressed as lance armstrong and is tearing shit up.
Just say its a British thing. They wont know Its not. And if they say you're not British, proposition them for a post-sex game of cricket.
Everything was yummy and fruit flavored and five alive and happymeas.
I just traded 5 cigarettes for a sandwich on they greyhound.You owe me 5 cigarettes. I told you I would get hungry.
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
See, I'm just thinking of how...angular my room is. You probably would have sustained brain damage
You pretty much lost your mind. Your ego has gotten ten time the size of your balls.
I've seen you go skiing on a Tuesday, but you think you're too good for TGI Friday's?
Randomize
