called my therapist. she asked if I was sad bc of m.j.'s death. are ppl that pathetic?
you need more empathy. some people get depressed for reasons OTHER than being a whore.
I'll be waiting for you under the stairs with peanut butter and tequila ... Don't tell the neighbors
I just saw a girl walking home wearing a tshirt, boxers, and cowboy boots. Thanks for having the decency to drive me to my car.
I ate a lot of your sunchips. I mean a lot. Like 4 to 5 bags.
Her brother is deaf.
no wonder she was so good with her hands
She just told me she had a double jointed jaw and winked at me while eating her bananna. That's not possible right?
I came so hard just now that I think I may have regenerated.
I think the threesome was inevitable when she walked out in nothing but his boxers followed by him completely naked.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
HELP! How do I get paint off the dog?
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
who says I'm not relevant to the kids today? Just had snapchat sex, blows the roof off aim cyber sex
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I brought those bastards cookies so they can deal with my sex noise, fuck them and their roommate asses
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
