You know it's an interesting night when you drunkenly scream at your boss, "You'd make a HORRIBLE OBGYN!! You're hands are ENORMOUS!"
you shoved the noah's ark of animal crakers in your mouth saturday.
you didnt know i had herpes?
we just drove by a car that was painted for a grad, it said "you done it!" with a confederate flag bumper sticker next to it. i love kentucky
I am literally missing a chunk of eyelashes. That's how fun it was.
She's yelling about threesomes and realllly wants you to come over. Put the pieces together.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
Just watched an entire Mariachi band walk of shame home together. Halloween at its finest
I'm turning twenty & the only honorable way to exit my teens is by slapping the fuck outta the bag. You better be in.
Just walked past the field playing Jesus music with a fanny pack full of condoms and beer. Happy Sunday.
Not sure what happened last night, but I woke up without a shirt on and cereal glued to my boobs...
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
Facebook just reminded me of the time I found two IHop cheese sticks in my hand bag. Those were the days.
I threw up in 4 different Starbucks across the city before 9 am.
All of a sudden he got that look on his face and ran to the dance floor and started fist pumping to Rihanna that kind of night
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