this girl looks like the female version of brooke hogan
it was better than the time i puked and I forgot to open the lid of the toilet
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Is it socially acceptable to order two burrito bowls?
anything's socially acceptable if you do it with enough confidence
Arguably, the best part was cockblocking those squirrels.
drinking out of a sandbucket again
Just suggested things for my dad to get my mom for Christmas in terms of "yeah you'll get laid."
It's 9am. I'm four lines ahead of you already. Wake up.
It's my 3rd annual 21st birthday party. Disney themed. There will be blood.
Getting drunk in an Applebee's pray for me
Lord god protect this child
Omg my brain. Most recent thought: I fucking prayed in the bathroom that the other girl would leave. Prayed to Jesus
You need to get a passport so we can carry our bad decisions over the border
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
my mom is feeding me weed brownies...god help us
When we were in Vegas he tried to get an Elvis impersonator to act dead on a toilet so he could take photos. This is even worse
Randomize
