We succumbed to passion, and then he had to go meet his girlfriend. End of story.
new midget porn idea. Wizard of Jizz: Munchkins Revenge
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I was excited because I thought I didn't have to tell you about the crabs, but surprise! You got em!
I've been here 20 minutes and some creepy old man told me he wanted to know what my insides felt like. I hate gay bars.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
A guy wearing a hard hat while floating the river. It's the most responsible drinking we saw all day.
There is nacho cheese and blood everywhere.
apparently the last bar didn't like my halloween costume with syringes filled with whiskey
I may or may not have shit out a layer of my liver after that weekend.
I made Mark strip for me and do a stripper dance. I put 2 dollars in his mouth
I'm lowering my standards just so I can get laid, but I draw the line when a guy spells cool kewl
Yeah I had this grand plan to bring flaming dr pepper shots to some girls and say "these shots are hot, but not as hot as you" but instead I lit the bar on fire
Her husband thinks she's banging me and nothing is going to change his mind so I told her we might as well just bang and make him right
Thank god for Taco Bell keeping you out of jail
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