Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
the last thing i remember is ordering pitchers of white russians....
ill give you the fast version. Hooked up with 17 year old coworker while housestting for my boss
Overslept. So hungover. Apparently texting the first person in my contact list the time I would like to wake up is not how the alarm clock in my phone actually works.
Id fuck him but only at his house and he had to stay im bed till i left. He only works upper body. It just creeps me out how tiny his legs are
You sent me a cat video and you screaming drunkenly in my background
I had a dream last night you were Aladdin. I think due to me watching 6 hours of Disney movies and the fact you told me you were wearing a vest.
Dreams are coming true for both of us.
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Reminding you of hookups your brain is trying to suppress. That's what friends are fooooooooor...
Would love to dress up in respectable attire and take you out somewhere nice and then do disgusting crude things in public
Will u make me a "6 month anniversary of being single" cake??? I wanna celebrate
I think i got my first booty call. it was like she came to my house. sex. leave.
Congratulations. Welcome to the wonderful world of quick dirty secret sexy time.
thanks... i think. haha
I'll explain later but I just had to legally commit to abstinence for the next 4 months
You're lucky I'm holding your vagina in my best interests
I just had a morning three-some with marijuana and a detachable shower-head
Randomize
