I wish you were here to vomit in your hand.
Ask Niel how long his lasts if he plays with it a lot.
he says 15-20 minutes depending on the porn.
no his phone, idiot.
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
We couldn't find any ping pong balls, so we used a fishing bobber. Could we be more country?
please dont tell anyone i was drunk
you were publicly making out with a very old very spandex covered woman...they know
I just saw someone EAT a flashcard out of frustration. Finals suck.
bong water from a few floors above me just splashed onto my face when i was looking out the window. Happy 4/21 to me
Im embracing the luau theme and maybe bringing a kiddie pool filled with alcohol. Im also embracing the high probability I will not remember this night.
so how does soaking flintstones gummy vitamins in vodka not make perfect sense
Also I walked home in over mitts \nLet's take a minute to really laugh about that
That girl from the bar sent me a text saying that she wants to wear my cock as a hat. A cock hat. Is that good or bad?
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
I need a nap, Harry Potter movies, and dick in this exact order after work.
By chance and just chance did you find a cock ring? By chance
It's one of those "I can't stand you but we're stuck in the same hotel room tonight so let's fuck until one of us passes out" kind of nights.
Randomize
