I have a feeling we are going to become cougars together.
Dude, this chick just tossed my salad hard. All that I could picture was a dog trying to get the last of the peanut butter out of the jar of Jiff and trying not to think of how grotesque my last dump was.
Then she tried to kiss me and I wouldn't and she got pissed off and went to sleep. Then about an hour later, her kid called her. She went home and on the way out I told her to wash her mouth before she kissed her kid good night. Weird night..
For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
and on the fourth day, god made foam parties.
Why does it always end up with me crying in my car.
All of our toilets in my house are broken. Thank God I've practiced peeing in the sink enough.
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
haha she has always seemed a little off. when i met her i was told she was the queen slut. and she had a crown on at the time. it seemed appropriate.
I should know better than to trust a man I've seen cry on multiple occasions to give me accurate sports information.
She is currently expressing her joy for "bad to the bone" through interpretive dance...
I need a new pic for your contact id. Because your boobs popping up when I'm having dinner with my grandma or, ya know, when kids have my phone isn't so good.
I put you to bed and you would not go unless I let you sleep with the vodka
Find me a cup with a lid so I can illegally drink in your car. I'll be there in bout 10 minutes.
Like why am I even still facebook friends with a guy I let finger me at a concert?
I mean, you've had my nipples in your mouth now, so I think we've reached a certain level of friendship.
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